My Mirror Image

Yesterday, for the first time, I practiced yoga in front of a mirror. I went to a very well known and respected yoga studio in DC and to my surprise, even the noon class was packed. The studio was on the larger size with one mirrored wall. When the class started, I felt myself sort of avoiding looking straight ahead, where the mirrored wall was. I felt like as soon as I saw myself, I would immediately start critiquing myself and of course, my body. You know the drill. I wanted to concentrate on the class. So, in order to stop thinking about NOT thinking about looking at myself, I moved a little to the right of my mat and in a narrow space in the mirror, full of other reflections, I looked at myself. Head to toe. And something strange happened. I took me all in and instead of thinking about how much leaner I wish my inner thighs were, I looked at my form. And I thought - I'm doing my best. I feel good in the poses. It's obvious I'm not the most advanced in the class but you know, for where my body is at this stage in my practice - I look good. And it felt good to say that to myself! At that moment, I got it. I realized that is one of the best things about yoga...it's not about what your body looks like. It's not about how perfect you come into poses. It's not about who can meditate the longest. You aren't competing with your neighbor or even yourself. In practicing yoga, you do it just as you are and you determine your own potential. The reward of yoga, feeling good both physically and mentally (achieving balance), is based entirely on you. I felt great after that class and I will go back to that studio. But the next time, I won't avoid looking straight ahead.